tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5308923185697655557.post5005895967402231402..comments2023-07-06T03:24:58.768-04:00Comments on Your Big Girl Pants: Pretty In Pink-Sex Segregation and ToysEmilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11713092722965430212noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5308923185697655557.post-86154545329414703722012-12-04T15:56:45.883-05:002012-12-04T15:56:45.883-05:00Yeah, that eightth-grader deserves some lauding. ...Yeah, that eightth-grader deserves some lauding. <br /><br />I do think parenting is extremely important, but society still has an influence on our kids, just look at the ideas kids bring back from their friends at school. And I think no matter how we try to mitigate the messages, kids go out in the world, and they know what the message is, and it does hit home to some extent. The thing that is particularly baffling to me is that I feel like it was nowhere near this bad in the late-70s/early 80s when I was a kid. The color stratification and the princess crap and some of the ties between the violence-heavy boy cartoons/movies and the action figures. Sure, we had star wars and we had princesses. But it's just nuts right now. <br /><br />On the up side, I was overjoyed to see this video from Sesame Street with Justice Sotomayor, and it's been really useful talking to the Daughter about princesses: http://youtu.be/EHICz5MYxNQ<br />Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11713092722965430212noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5308923185697655557.post-21865987887753784772012-12-04T12:44:04.367-05:002012-12-04T12:44:04.367-05:00I'm so proud of that eighth-grade girl!
Emily...I'm so proud of that eighth-grade girl!<br /><br />Emily, I think the effect of the toys will depend on the parenting style in general and the morals and values parents pass down to their children. Barbie is not a problem if parents are teaching their daughters, explicitly and implicitly, to be smart, independent, and active. Similarly, Beadboy2's obsession with weapons and fighting toys is not causing him to be violent because we have instinctively phrased this stuff as good v. evil, fighting to protect and help others, not starting fights, etc. In other words, not fighting for fighting's sake.<br /><br />More generally, I do what I can to keep things, if not exactly gender-neutral, at least gender-equal. So I call the Batman and knight toys "dolls" and not "action figures." I make it clear there is no such thing as a girl or boy toy, or girl or boy color. I bought plastic bangles for the Beadboys, because they loved playing with my intricately-beaded ones and I did not want a disaster. I bought baby dolls to help Beadboy1 adjust when I was pregnant. (He was uninterested, and flung the dolls around. Beadboy2, on the other hand, loves taking care of them like real babies. Amusingly, he is their Granddad, not their dad.) When I have a choice, I pick toys that aren't coded for a particular gender.<br /><br />But it is so hard to escape gender-stereotyping! Beadboy2 is picking it up at school, although I do my best to squash it. And last year he was teased by several boys because purple is his favorite color, but apparently that's a color for girls. I told him purple is a color for everyone, and that it used to be that only kings wore purple. What I really wanted to do, though, was give the parents of those boys a piece of my mind. How are people in this day and age still passing that crap on to their kids???beadgirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04545183481263349646noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5308923185697655557.post-41394798987209467702012-12-04T10:28:27.471-05:002012-12-04T10:28:27.471-05:00It's a constant issue with me and the Daughter...It's a constant issue with me and the Daughter. I want her to get to have Girly-ness and not think Boy-ness is in some way superior, but I have limited patience for the awful messaging that comes with the Pink, the play vacuums and babies and kitchens, and the Princessification of everything. Of course, I also reject the violence rife in the Boy section. How do these things affect kids in the long run? Do girls become boy-and-looks-obssessed and boys become violent? How can it not have a long-term effect, when play is in some ways what kids do to practice adult things?Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11713092722965430212noreply@blogger.com